Happy 18th, to me

Congratulations Bianca, eighteen years seen and gone. Many people now question who you have become. They say you have changed, lost your way. You have made many mistakes—done some immoral, bad things. Indeed, things as a child you vowed to never do. Your morals, attitude, and beliefs evolved over the years. Maybe you did lose your way at some parts, but isn’t that just part of growing up? Getting lost and finding your way. Deep down you still have a good heart, filled with love and passion. You didn’t change, you’re just surfacing into adulthood. Even through all your life experiences to-date, you are still young, naïve, and innocent. Of course you made mistakes, everyone has. Yes, you fucked-up and did some bad things. But you’ve accepted it and adapted to those changes. And despite what many think, you have learned and become a better person through everything. Things may get blurry and their may be a lot of shades of gray, but you still know right from wrong. Every single experience has taught you something new about life, and has only made you stronger. Many people underestimate you, however, you know you are brilliant and your mind is a sponge fiending for knowledge everyday. Your potential was never lost. It just continues to grow consistently. You did what you felt you had to do to fulfill certain aspects of your identity and answer questions that needed to be answered. Nevertheless, one day, you will make your mommy and daddy proud. Just as they have never lost faith in you, you have never lost faith in yourself. You truly are becoming an adult and you certainly know every action you take today and all your experiences now are inevitably contributing to your future and identity. Your perspective and view on life expands daily. You never have or will be close-minded. Even if certain individuals may disagree, continue to be free and experiment with life. Its what you are suppose to do. Your insatiable need to live and learn has been proven to be the best method for your pursuit of happiness. Fight for yourself, fight for change, fight for progress. Most importantly, no matter what society says, never doubt your potential, beauty, wisdom, and strength. There will undoubtedly be days you will continue to regret and question yourself. Regardless, in the end, you will do great things, and even if just through a butterfly effect, change the world.

“If I had a chance for another try, I wouldn’t change a thing. Its made me all who I am inside. I thank god that I am here and alive. Every day I wait, I tell myself a little harmless lie--the whole wide world is mine. Summer is gone. The years have passed. My friends have changed, a few did last. The smallest dreams got pushed aside, the largest ones that changed my life. Its all success if its what you need. Do what you like and do it honestly. “

This is what you need to never forget.